The importance of music and faith

The last few weeks have been like me stepping out of fog. For too long depression and anxiety have taken control of me. This is something I have fought on and off since 2010. But sometimes it is something as simple as finding something to help you find your faith. My faith is who I am as a person. My belief that I am a good man and can try to live my life the best I can.

What I found was a band called Skillet. Now, the most ironic part of this is that I found out they are considered a christian rock band. This was really confusing at first as I did not want to associate anything with something religious. But thankfully the lyrics are just positive and moving and not overly religious in nature.

As a friend said, I shouldn’t be so worried about where the inspiration comes from and just accept that it did.

Yesterday? I felt as good as I have in a long damn time. I got spend time with a great friend and it was an amazing night. It is so damn nice to just feel something that resembles happiness.

Here are some lyrics I love so far, in no particular order.

Awake and Alive 

I'm at war with the world 

And they try to pull me into the dark

I struggle to find my faith 

As I am slipping from your arms

It's getting harder to stay awake

And my strength is fading fast

Your breathe into me at last

I ’m awake, I’m alive

Now, I know what I believe inside

Now, it’s my time

I’ll do what I want ‘cause this is my life

Here (right here)

Right now (right now)

Stand my ground and never back down

I know what I believe inside

I’m awake, and I’m alive

Never Surrender

Do you know what it’s like when you’re scared to see yourself

Do you know what it’s like when you wish you were someone else

Who didn’t need your help to get by

Do you know what it’s like to wanna surrender

Do you know what it's like when you're not who you wanna be?

Do you know what it's like to be your own worst enemy?

Who sees the things in me I can't hide?

Do you know what it's like to wanna surrender?

I don't wanna feel like this tomorrow

I don't wanna live like this today

Make me feel better

I wanna feel better

Stay with me here now and never surrender

Not gonna die tonight

This is how it feels when you’re bent and broken

This is how it feels when your dignity’s stolen

When everything you love is leaving

You hold on to what you believe in

No, not gonna die tonight

We’re gonna stand and fight forever

(don’t close your eyes)

No, not gonna die tonight

We’re gonna fight for us together

No, were not gonna die tonight

One day too late

Today I’m gonna try a little harder

Gonna make every minute last longer

Gonna learn to forgive and forget

Gonna we don’t have long, gonna make the most of it

Whispers in the dark

No, you’ll never be alone

When darkness comes I’ll light night with stars

Hear the whispers in the dark

No, you’ll never be alone

When darkness comes you know I’m never far

Hear the whispers in the dark