My plan, and the first two 250 words entries...

So, the plan is going to post anything that I write for the 250 words on here. Along with, anything that I write for the book. To keep from spamming too much, I am going to only post the 250 words after writing 2-3 of them. 

Mike

Two years ago this previous Sunday, my brother died at the age of 42. He died of cancer. 

I am now 43, and it saddens me so much that he was taken away at such a young age. I don’t want to paint a false picture here as since I was adopted, I had not seen my brother in over 20 years. But in the few years before his death, we actually communicated much more often. Not as much as I would like to have, but sadly that is how it feels when you realize you can never speak to that person again. 

I wish I had gotten to tell him how much I cared and respected who he was. I have NEVER known someone that was a better person. Ever. He touched so many people.

My best memory of Mike is that he took me to see one of my favorite movies of all time. The Princess Bride. I must have been like 15 or so, since I don’t remember when it came out. This movie has always had special meaning for me as it was one of the few times in my life I actually got to spend time with him.

So, every time I watch this movie I think of him. I cannot watch this movie and not cry a little as I realize he is no longer here. I wish I had told him how special this memory was. 

But that is ok, it will never leave me.

Pittsburgh

So, I spent the first two years living here, fighting the fact that I was not in NYC. To make things worse, I made fun of the city as often as I could during that time.

Yeah, I know, not cool.

It isn't like there was anything wrong with Pittsburgh, but NYC was the first place in my life that felt like home. Also, the manner in which I left the city left a bad taste in my mouth. I also put unrealistic thoughts in my head about how easy it would be to get back to NYC. Knowing how bad the job market is there, and also knowing how expensive it is. So, when I did not reach my goals in the last couple of years, I beat myself up for it. 

Yes, I am aware of how silly that is.

Now? The city has grown on me. I have close friends here and have met some wonderful people here. Which includes a younger version of myself, whose friendship means the world to me. I hope she knows that. Also, there are some really great gamers here, but I need to actually get out and see them more.

But, the realization came out of nowhere. I was walking downtown about a month ago and I realized that for the first time I liked Pittsburgh. I am not sure when that changed, but I am thankful for it.

Yes, I may eventually get back to NYC at some point, but I want to enjoy my life here, and that started with letting go of the past.